Hi, I'm Harry the Gull...
Let me personally welcome you to Quahog County and my blog...
"I know many secrets about Wickford, so let me share one with you. I grew up here in Wickford. So, as a native, I really know this town – especially where to get good food.
"Quahogs? I eat 'em all the time, but I have to drop 'em on a rock, first. Lobsters? Wickford has the best – if you look in the right place. (We gulls know these things. Believe me!)
"Okay, back to that secret... It's Duffy's. Please don't click to another page!
This is a good story!
"Y' see, I can't eat at Duffy's anymore. And I miss it, big time! So that's why I'm standing here telling you about it. What happened? Well, being a gull, I had to sneak around to the back door and hope for the best. But no more! Too many cats. Too dangerous for me there.
"But YOU! You're no gull! You can walk right through Duffy's front door!
And sit down in a nice chair... And have an attractive lady bring bring you stuffies... crabs... lobster... appetizers... deserts... All you want, when you want it. And brought to your table, too!
"Oh... I'm soooo jealous... All that good food. You're so lucky not to be a gull...
"How are the prices? Well, on Duffy's page there's a link to their menu, so you can see that prices are very reasonable. And take it from Harry the Gull, the portions are generous. (I used to watch them every day. )
"I have to take off pretty soon. (The tide's going out and I'm getting hungry.)
So while you drive on over to Duffy's, I'm going to try and retrieve a quahog that I dropped in this fishing net here. (I meant to drop it on the deck, but I missed.)
"Would you give me some help? Just run your mouse over this picture. Thanks. That clam's really stuck in there, darn it. Oh, you're leaving. So long. Enjoy your meal. And please tell Capt. Stu that Harry the Gull sent you – and that I really miss all his good food at Duffy's back door."
Hot News: Quahog Emporium
"Generally, we gulls don't get excited about a new shop opening up in downtown Wickford — unless it has something to do with food. So we've been watching a new place on Brown Street, right next door to the Wickford Diner. Why? Well, it has a big sign that says "Quahog Emporium."
"Anything to do with quahogs is something we want to know about! We hear that it will be opening some time in June and it will have food (yummm) and all sorts of things to do with the quahog and other Rhode Island traditions.
 |
"I overheard Stu mention there will be jewelry made from quahog shell and purple stingray skins. He said the Quahog Emporium will be the only place in the world where you can get jewelry like that. As a gull, I don't give a damm about the jewelry, but with quahogs and stingrays, there's always hope for a hungry gull." |
In August
"I overheard some folks here in the harbor say they are going to The Big E next month, and they made me hungry. They said Tucker Seafood will be there in the Rhode Island building. And that got me wondering whether us gulls can find more to eat at the Big E than here in Wickford. Even if it's just french fries and pizza crust!
"Folks on a yacht said, 'All we have to do is sail down the coast and then up the Connecticut River to Springfield, Mass. It will be a fun trip!'
"So that started me thinkin' it might be cool to follow along behind that yacht. Heck, a whole gang of us Wickford gulls might just follow along and see what we can find at the Big E – especially by the back door of the Rhode Island Building. Won't that be a trip!
"Heck, this might be better than Duffy's! Sure miss Stu's clam cakes and stuffies. If you see us there, and if we're actin' like hungry gulls, please toss us a couple of clamcakes – one for me, and one for my girlfriend Mary."
In July
"Hi, I'm back. Let me tell you about my latest adventure at Duffy's. Mary and I were perched on one of those blue bait barrels down at Wickford harbor yesterday. In the water, we saw two pink buoys, and we heard a some Cranston kids read the words: 'SWEET Misery.'
 |
"I told Mary that's exactly how I was feeling – miserable – that maybe I had offended Capt. Stu, and maybe if I did him a favor or two, he might like us again – and let us go dumpster diving at Duffy's. Mary said I was a crazy gull: 'What kind of a favor could you, a gull, do for somebody like Stu? Huh? What could you do?' |
"Then I got an inspiration. Duffy's always needs fresh quahogs and snails. And I know where to find them. So I decided to get our gang together and go down to that little pond behind the Wickford Diner, there on Brown Street, where nobody ever goes quahoging except us gulls. And we'd all fly back to Duffy's and drop all that fresh-caught shellfish right there in the parking lot, where the chef could come out and pick it up. Stu couldn't get seafood any fresher than that! (So I thought.)
"Our mission was going great until Mary accidentally dropped a big quahog onto a red convertible that already had a couple of silver starfish on it. The quahog bounced off the hood and landed on the pavement – broken. One of our gang is a different kind of gull. Bird watchers call him a "Laughing Gull." And I guess he's well named, 'cause when he saw that delicious quahog lying there, broken and waiting to be eaten, he let loose with one of the loudest and insane laughs I've ever heard!
"The driver didn't seem to like being laughed at, so he started hollering at us and shaking his fist. He was so mad ... you'd think I had pooped on his windshield or something!
"Our bombing run sure was a lot of work, ferrying all those quahogs over to Duffy's. And I guess with the Fourth of July holiday coming in a few days, all of us gulls learned a lesson about the importance of being independent – and finding our own food alongshore. As much as we like dumpster diving. "
A note from Harry's translator: When Harry tells these tall tales, he's like an old time Yankee storyteller, doing things like imitating that Laughing Gull's crazy outburst, which you might enjoy hearing for yourself. Here's a link to a page (opens in a new window) with a great version of the laugh, and when you get there, just scroll down the page to where you can Listen to Call. Click on the "play" arrow to start the crazy laughing. While you're on that page, check out some interesting facts about these gulls, like their ability to predict storms – and the proper word for Harry's "gang." Would you believe: "flotilla," "screech," and "squabble?" Above all, enjoy your time in Quahog County. (Especially the great seafood. Harry says that if you lived in someplace like Arizona, you'd miss it "big time." ) |
02/14/12